Rachel Goldberg-Polin’s life now revolves around a new calendar, one marked not by weeks or months, but by days of absence and heartache. Each morning, she wakes and marks a number on a piece of tape, which she then sticks to her clothing. It’s the number of days that have passed since her son Hersh was taken hostage – or as she puts it, stolen – by Hamas. As we sit down in Jerusalem, that number stands at 155.
On the fateful morning of 7 October, Rachel received two messages from Hersh. The first simply said, “I love you.” The second, sent immediately after, read, “I’m sorry.” When she tried calling him, there was no answer. “It rang and rang,” she recalls. “I wrote ‘Are you okay? Let me know you are okay.’ None of those messages were ever seen. My throat clenched and my stomach curled up. I just knew something horrible was unfolding, and I knew he knew.”
Hersh was caught in the chaos of the Hamas attacks at the Supernova music festival. Seeking refuge in a bomb shelter, he was eventually captured by Hamas militants. The last image of the 23-year-old is in a Hamas video, being loaded onto a truck surrounded by gunmen, with his left arm missing.
Since the attacks, over 1,200 Israelis, mostly civilians, have been killed by Hamas, triggering relentless bombings by Israel in Gaza, resulting in over 31,000 deaths, with 70% of the casualties being women and children.
Rachel’s mission now is to bring her son and the remaining hostages back home. Hersh is among 130 hostages still held in Gaza from the October attacks. Israel fears that at least 30 of them may already be dead.
Campaigning for their safe return has become Rachel’s full-time job, as she and her husband Jon have put their careers on hold since the attacks. However, five months on, the attention on the hostages is waning, both domestically and internationally.
Despite the despair, Rachel’s face lights up when she speaks about Hersh. Describing him as a happy-go-lucky soccer fan with a passion for music festivals, she reveals his plans for a round-the-world trip that was abruptly halted due to his captivity.
As hopes for a deal to bring the hostages back before Ramadan remain unfulfilled, Rachel’s resolve remains unshaken. “Hope is mandatory,” she asserts. “I believe it and I have to believe it, that he will come back to us.”
In the midst of this tragedy, Rachel is also mindful of the suffering of families in Gaza, calling for an end to the pain on both sides of the conflict. The trauma faced by the hostages, both those who have returned and those still in captivity, is immense, with experts warning that healing will be a long and arduous process.
The story of Rachel and other families waiting for their loved ones to return from Gaza is one of heartbreak, resilience, and unwavering hope in the face of unimaginable loss.